Conspiracy Theory
Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 5:56 pm
Andrew Bisharat's TNB;
Conspiracy Theory
Today is 9/11, the six-year anniversary of the day that some humorless bastards—who’ve obviously never been rock climbing—attacked our country.
In 31 days, the biggest climbing event of 2007 commences in Kentucky, the 15th state to join the Union. That’s right: the Petzl RocTrip is coming to the Red River Gorge, the best climbing area in the country, October 12-14.
9/11 plus six years later equals 26, the exact age of Chris Sharma, who will be attending the RocTrip and signing posters on Friday night, right before showing his new flick King Lines. He will also likely tear apart the RocTrip’s Flash Rally, a most ruthless and unforgiving comp that is not to be missed, on Saturday October 13.
Chris Sharma’s 26 years, plus 31 days till the RocTrip, minus 2007, equals 46.
Forty-six minus Kentucky, the Union’s 15th state, equals … great-beard-of-Bin-Laden … 31!
Thirty-one! The exact number of days until the Petzl Roc Trip comes to the Red River Gorge!
Coincidence? Or have I just posited most compelling 9/11 conspiracy theory ever?
If this eBlast hasn’t already sent you into a out-of-control panic spiral, then this will: Spots are quickly filling up for RocTrip’s clinics. For a mere $40, you can register for trad and sport clinics taught by Lynn Hill, Lev Pinter, Chris Lindner, Alli Rainey, Arno Ilgner, Cedar Wright, Kevin Wilkinson and local diva Katie Brown, who pretty much owns the Red.
In addition to clinics that are guaranteed to make you a better climber, you must register At Once for breakfasts, dinners, the Friday night screening of King Lines and the Saturday night dance party. Even if you’re just a boulderer, registering for clinics is really easy to do (click here), not to mention important. By pre-registering, you’ll be also entering yourself into the big raffle that is giving away a Sultan’s worth of shwag. Do it now or else the terrorists will win and there will be no more fun, no more fall football and certainly no more Pendergrass-Murray Recreational Preserve (PMRP), the 750-acres of climber-owned land that has more good climbing than whatever rotten, miserable little road-cut crag you’re used to going to has.
And even though Katie Brown “ownsâ€
Conspiracy Theory
Today is 9/11, the six-year anniversary of the day that some humorless bastards—who’ve obviously never been rock climbing—attacked our country.
In 31 days, the biggest climbing event of 2007 commences in Kentucky, the 15th state to join the Union. That’s right: the Petzl RocTrip is coming to the Red River Gorge, the best climbing area in the country, October 12-14.
9/11 plus six years later equals 26, the exact age of Chris Sharma, who will be attending the RocTrip and signing posters on Friday night, right before showing his new flick King Lines. He will also likely tear apart the RocTrip’s Flash Rally, a most ruthless and unforgiving comp that is not to be missed, on Saturday October 13.
Chris Sharma’s 26 years, plus 31 days till the RocTrip, minus 2007, equals 46.
Forty-six minus Kentucky, the Union’s 15th state, equals … great-beard-of-Bin-Laden … 31!
Thirty-one! The exact number of days until the Petzl Roc Trip comes to the Red River Gorge!
Coincidence? Or have I just posited most compelling 9/11 conspiracy theory ever?
If this eBlast hasn’t already sent you into a out-of-control panic spiral, then this will: Spots are quickly filling up for RocTrip’s clinics. For a mere $40, you can register for trad and sport clinics taught by Lynn Hill, Lev Pinter, Chris Lindner, Alli Rainey, Arno Ilgner, Cedar Wright, Kevin Wilkinson and local diva Katie Brown, who pretty much owns the Red.
In addition to clinics that are guaranteed to make you a better climber, you must register At Once for breakfasts, dinners, the Friday night screening of King Lines and the Saturday night dance party. Even if you’re just a boulderer, registering for clinics is really easy to do (click here), not to mention important. By pre-registering, you’ll be also entering yourself into the big raffle that is giving away a Sultan’s worth of shwag. Do it now or else the terrorists will win and there will be no more fun, no more fall football and certainly no more Pendergrass-Murray Recreational Preserve (PMRP), the 750-acres of climber-owned land that has more good climbing than whatever rotten, miserable little road-cut crag you’re used to going to has.
And even though Katie Brown “ownsâ€
