RRC Archives

*If You Love the President . . .*
Take this poll. Don't worry, you can sign with an X.

By Gene Weingarten
Sunday, February 18, 2007; W40

According to a recent survey, 17 percent of the American public
"/strongly/" approves of the job George W. Bush is doing. Not just
approves, but strongly approves. I found those numbers interesting but
incomplete. Don't you want to know who those people are? What sorts of
lives do they lead? How they make their judgments?

I think we can safely presume that about one-tenth of 1 percent of these
people are plutocrats, al-Qaeda sleeper cell agents, Lockheed Martin
executives, vice presidents of the United States, etc. But what about
the rest? In the interests of fair and responsible journalism, and
without any preconceived biases, I have created a poll to scientifically
analyze this group of Americans. Please do not answer the questions
below unless you "strongly approve" of the job President Bush is doing.

/1. How do you think the war in Iraq is going?/

a) Splendidly

b) Very well, indeed

c) Quite nicely, thank you

d) Pretty darned okay

/2. How would you rate the president's handling of Hurricane Katrina?/

a) Masterful

b) Super

c) Four stars

d) Very, very good

/3. What is the biggest problem facing America today?/

a) People criticizing President Bush

b) Discrimination against shotgun enthusiasts

c) Sissies

d) The Jews

/4. How do you pronounce "America"?/

a) Murka

b) Other

/5. What is your first name?/

a) Elmer

b) Lucille

c) Other

/6. What is your preferred method of deflecting alien mind-control eams?/

a) An aluminum-foil hat

b) Replacing metal tooth fillings with composite

c) Rhythmic chanting while naked

d) Shooting into the air toward suspected mother ships

/7. What is your primary source of news?/

a) Cow behavior, caterpillar activity, tree-moss changes, etc.

b) What my common-law spouse heard at bingo

c) Homeland Security color-alert changes

d) The Bible

/8. How many cars does your family own?/

a) Three to five

b) Six to nine

c) Ten to 14

d) Fifteen or more

/9. Of those cars, how many are not on blocks in your yard?/

a) One

b) None

/10. If you were a Renaissance-era poem, what meter would you be in?/

a) Iambic pentameter

b) Anapestic hexameter

c) Trochaic septameter, with a single spondaic foot

d) Just kidding! Go on to the next question.

/11. What is your favorite sport?/

a) Huntin'

b) Fishin'

c) Rasslin'

d) Hot dog-eatin' contests

/12. What is your current field of employment?/

a) Hubcap brokerage

b) Scrap metal redemption

c) Driveway resurfacing and refrigerator repair and auto detailing and
septic tank servicing

d) License plate manufacturing at a correctional institution

/13. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?/

a) I'd like to be able to be weighed without the use of a forklift and
truck scales.

b) I'd like to own my own TV, instead of renting.

c) I'm okay with just the two teeth, but I'd like 'em to touch.

d) I'd like to be smart, like George W. Bush.

well after taking that test alan, i see that he IS doing a great job.

haha, thats hilarious, I hope you don't mine but I am sending it to some non-climber friends of mine

Shit Alan, I just don't understand why conservatives think liberals are a bunch of intellectually superior bigots.
You have to meet folks where they live, not tell them they are stupid. Why do you think people voted for Bush in the first place. B/c he didn't make them feel defensive/ insult them.
Dems will never win as long as they are belittling the intellect and culture of a huge percentage of the electorate.

so what the lurkist is saying is that its only the lower 70% of the population who are below averge and at least 20% of them are voting democratic anyway, its that other 50% that voted republican who emotions we need to attend to allen

krampus wrote:so what the lurkist is saying is that its only the lower 70% of the population who are below averge and at least 20% of them are voting democratic anyway, its that other 50% that voted republican who emotions we need to attend to allen

No, what he is saying is, for a group of feel good/warm fuzzies/everyone is equal, liberals, it's ok to make fun of anyone whom you deem lower than yourself. It's funny though, you guys will slam the poor white trash of America while embracing the Islamofascists of the world. When your world comes crashing down around you, remember it's usually the white folk who make everything all right. So at the next peace rally, tree hugging event you attend, make sure to crack some jokes about anyone who doesnt belong in your level of the caste system, I'm sure it will make you feel better about yourself.

no I pretty much make fun of everyone to account for my inferiority complex. The alternative was to buy a hummer.

If 70% of people are below average, that wouldn't actually be an average would it? Shouldn't that be closer to 50%?

dink, dink..
think back to stats in college...

mean, median, mode....you can make the numbers say what you want.