RRC Archives

Could someone point me to a good manicurist? Wonderful two days at the Red Friday and Saturday. Wish I were there today. Oh well.

http://www.redriverclimbing.com/album_p ... ic_id=1345

Man, that is eerie. Those look just like my hands from yesterday.

Excellent! I hope you had a great day as well.

I must admit two things. First, the injury at the top of my left third fingernail (ugly and red) is from a phillips drill bit in an 18v dewalt being shoved against a 1 1/4" screw with all the force I could muster with my right arm. It penetrated over 1/8" and smashed the fuck out of my fingernail so it was WAY tender before I went out. Second is the scabby area on my right first knuckle which I lopped off when a piece of broken glass tipped towards me (that's right, about the size of half a black-eyed pea smooshed down quivering on the edge of the piece of glass. Never a sound or a feeling.) . That was about a month ago. But all the other abrasions, cuts, and divets are from shoving my hands into cracks for two beautiful winter days in the Gorge.

Kind of bugs me how old my hands look, though...

Oh wait. I forgot. I am getting old. Fuck.

alan,

what type of climbing would that be where the back of your hand touches the rock?

never heard of it.

is "battle wound" spraying more legit than sport redpoint spray?

Hmmm... I used to spray about my climbing battle wounds, I thought it was something special. Now I look at it this way: Its proof that you
1) Are not careful about jamming
or
2) climb routes that require nasty jams

The answer is number 2.

I'm also not a "real" climber so stop being nasty to me, alright?!? I'm just a frail old man flailing his way up cracks at the edge of his abilities. Leave me alone, sonny, before I beat the living shit out of you.

And I'm not "spraying." I think those hands look like I had a LOT OF FUN climbing trad routes in the Red. I spent TWO DAYS (TWO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL WINTER DAYS) sticking my hands into cheese grater cracks AND I LOVED IT!!! DO YOU HEAR ME?!?!? Were you climbing in the Red Friday and Saturday? Huh? Were you? Did you lead a route that is at the edge of your abilities on Saturday? Did you? Did you climb in the sun on the rock in a t-shirt and pants and feel totally comfortable? Well I did, so there. Even if I'm not a "real" climber I had a great time Friday and Saturday "climbing" on the rock outside in the Gorge. Yeah. I feel pretty damned good about that. Yep.

Nice battle wounds Alan. I love coming home looking like that!

You should see the scrapes and bruises on the rest of me.
Actually, if you asked me to see them I'd faint.
You are, indeed, too cute for words.

Love,
Your secret admirer.

take it to the bedroom, you poodles in heat.

actually, alan, I was outside climbing at the edge of my abilities in a tshirt and shorts..no, actually i had no shirt on it was so nice. why the angst my friend? doesn't seem like the R & R did you any good..your stress is still topped out.

go see your therapist, cause the "fun" climbing brings ain't helpin' ya none.

Yeah, but I'm not a real climber. I'm just some old h*ack that can barely pull his lame ass up a beginner crack. I expect some of you "real" climbers to come beat me up and steal my rope because I dare think that I'm a rock climber. "So, you haven't climbed a 5.12a yet?!?" [kick kick thud thud ouch oof kick...]

But despite that, I had a killer two days at the Gorge and I'm almost as smug as if I'd had sex. Not quite that smug but pretty damned smug. Of course it's been so long since I've gotten any I can't remember what that smugness feels like... seems like sometimes the feeling of "terror"? is present?... Just can't remember. Seems it's pretty good, though.

Therapist, psssst. You saw those hands. Those are the hands of someone who's had some great therapy. The weather was fantastic, the sun was warm, the company was great, and the climbing was challenging. If that ain't therapy, I'm a transexual midget.

What?