limericks - lets here em

Post by **merrick** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 10:47 pm

there once was a climber from kentucky
he thought less than vertical climbs were sucky
he went to white horse
got scared and screamed till he was hoarse
but got off alive and considers himself lucky

there once was a climber who lived in his car
to go to a new area he would drive far
when he no more money for food
he would steal but was not shrewd
so now he lives in jail behind bars

Post by **Jeff** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 11:08 pm

You posting from the greybar Merrick?

Post by **Horatio Felacio** » Fri Aug 22, 2003 12:56 am

there once was a man named merrick,
his dream was to work on an oil derrick.
he couldn't get a job,
so instead he slobbered on knobs,
and now he has a soar larynx.

i know a dumb bitch named sprag. for short,
she knew that she wanted to be a whore at a port.
sailors went to see her every hour,
but her crotch smelled really sour,
so she started suckin' black dick for cocaine she could snort.

Post by **Artsay** » Mon Aug 25, 2003 1:00 am

I once knew a man from Nantucket.
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin,
As he wiped off his chin,
"If my ear were a cunt I would fuck it!"

I know this freak named Matt.
He's one downright Nasty cat.
He'll pull out his dick,
Like a theatrical hat trick,
So look out before you tap him on the back.

Post by **merrick** » Mon Aug 25, 2003 1:10 am

a classic

there once was a man from bel air
who liked to fuck his wife on the stair
when the banister broke
he continued to stroke
and he finished her off in the air

Post by **merrick** » Mon Aug 25, 2003 1:15 am

there once was boy called ho
he liked to fuck sheep real slow
the owner caught onto his plot
and soon horatio was caught
and he ended up giving the farmer a blow

Post by **Horatio Felacio** » Mon Aug 25, 2003 9:25 pm

there's a really big homosexual named merrick i know
there isn't an STD-carrying black cock he won't blow
the crack dealers just whip the blister-covered "nightstick" out
so merrick can lick on the oozing puss and avoid his pout
while he films "Merrick does Harlem" for show.

Post by **Horatio Felacio** » Mon Aug 25, 2003 9:29 pm

i know this fine cook named artsay
she and her gay boyfriend once had a party
this guy named matt puked in her sink
which caused an extraordinary stink
so she wants the next one to be held at stephanies.

Post by **merrick** » Mon Aug 25, 2003 9:39 pm

a chuffer named ho wanted to be done in the ass
he found a drunk homeless guy and made a pass
the guy was too drunk to get it stiff
so he inserted his hand way past his wrist
ho loved it so much he changed from a 'he' to a 'lass.'

Post by **Horatio Felacio** » Mon Aug 25, 2003 10:03 pm

i know this fucker named merrick something
i'm gonna get real drunk and kill this homo with the bling
he's gonna bleed like a stuck pig
SCIN's gonna suck off his berries and twig
while i sit back and laugh at the gay jesters like a king.

he's gonna hurt,
he's gonna pounded in to yogurt
i'm gonna kill him a lot
and on his face i'll squirt snot
and on fire is gonna be his shirt

merrick oh merrick how much i love thee
my heart yearns for you so much it stops all my pee pee
i want your body dismembering
it's gonna be a virtual merrick tree timbering
and i'm gonna post his head up for everyone to see