Terry
First time I knew I liked Terry was at Pebble Beach. He looked me in the eye with that knowing smile and said "You're pretty silly aren't you?" I chuckled and said "yeah"as if he'd figured me out, he confided "me too" and we were friends. We then discovered that we were not only both silly but he "was just 3 days older than me" (born on the 16th of July, me on the 19th). The years ...insignificant digits I guess.
Terry was an amazing person. He wasn't okay with just interacting, he insisted on diving deeper. He believed in full disclosure, that there is no need to hide a thing. Times spent with with him, for me, was reallly alot of fun. Even just walking through a boulder field or hanging at the crag. His respect and acceptance was like a challenge to be exactly myself. I will miss him dearly.
I believe Terry new what he was doing. He left this world in a beautiful place at his favorite time of day. I'm sure he heard the birds singing. I hope he knew how many people cared for him. Peace be with you Terry.
Terry was an amazing person. He wasn't okay with just interacting, he insisted on diving deeper. He believed in full disclosure, that there is no need to hide a thing. Times spent with with him, for me, was reallly alot of fun. Even just walking through a boulder field or hanging at the crag. His respect and acceptance was like a challenge to be exactly myself. I will miss him dearly.
I believe Terry new what he was doing. He left this world in a beautiful place at his favorite time of day. I'm sure he heard the birds singing. I hope he knew how many people cared for him. Peace be with you Terry.
Terry,
Sorry you had to check out so soon. You are missed. Thanks for teaching me the art of "rock science (not rockET science),"
and setting me straight when I needed to be. Hope you've found peace on the other side.
Sorry you had to check out so soon. You are missed. Thanks for teaching me the art of "rock science (not rockET science),"
and setting me straight when I needed to be. Hope you've found peace on the other side.
Last edited by Sketch on Thu Jun 01, 2006 2:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Terry loved talking to me about my irrational fears…thinking maybe there was something rational about them (believe me there isn’t).
In a couple of weeks I will be participating in my first adventure race. I will have to mountain bike, paddle and orienteer, but most of all I will have to overcome my fears. To help spur me on and give me extra courage I have decided my team name will be “The Kindred Spirits”.
I know that Terry would have been so proud and excited for me, and I believe his spirit will be waiting for me at the finish line.
In a couple of weeks I will be participating in my first adventure race. I will have to mountain bike, paddle and orienteer, but most of all I will have to overcome my fears. To help spur me on and give me extra courage I have decided my team name will be “The Kindred Spirits”.
I know that Terry would have been so proud and excited for me, and I believe his spirit will be waiting for me at the finish line.
-
Cliff Heindel
- Posts: 190
- Joined: Wed Oct 13, 2004 12:57 pm
Terry's reach was long.
To those of you who knew him well I am sorry for your loss. I can only express the regret I have at not having known him better. Even so, it
was apparent to me that his spirit was of the finest American tradition-
Whitman, Ginsburg, Twain. Irreverent yet committed to the end.
Goddammit Terry, you hadn't even begun to piss me off.
To those of you who knew him well I am sorry for your loss. I can only express the regret I have at not having known him better. Even so, it
was apparent to me that his spirit was of the finest American tradition-
Whitman, Ginsburg, Twain. Irreverent yet committed to the end.
Goddammit Terry, you hadn't even begun to piss me off.
'really ?' -fluffy
I have been climbing for 12 years and have always wanted to be stronger and send every route possible. These were my goals.
After being at Terry's funeral today, and seeing so many of the major players at the Red, old and new, it reaffirmed why I have been in the sport so long. . . Its not just about the aesthetics of line, or fluidity of movement that makes the sport so great, but its the astounding diversity and true kinship of the participants that make this activity unparalled.
Terry, above all knew this.
I feel honored to be a part of this community.
After being at Terry's funeral today, and seeing so many of the major players at the Red, old and new, it reaffirmed why I have been in the sport so long. . . Its not just about the aesthetics of line, or fluidity of movement that makes the sport so great, but its the astounding diversity and true kinship of the participants that make this activity unparalled.
Terry, above all knew this.
I feel honored to be a part of this community.
Can't we all just get along?
Every story needs a good character. Whether a novel, movie, tv news story sitcom, tall tale, or period in history good characters make it all happen. A good character can make us laugh, draws us into the story, make us mad, make us cry, confuse us, put us on the edge of our seat, or challenge our way of thinking all while making the story memorable. The Red River Gorge climbing community lost a memorable character, Terry was that character. Never was this more obvious than at the service today. Like someone said, "Everyone has a Terry story". And because of that his spirit will live on through the character that was Terry Kindred.
I see they are still lopping off mountains in Eastern Kentucky. Electricity isn't cheap.
I'm sitting here at the office, late, staring out the window - certainly not getting anything done. I'm watching an amazing sunset change and fade. The streaks of clouds were purple and pink, with bits of teal sky showing through. The horizon changed to a sort of dark desert sandstone red. I read through these pages stunned - the fact that no one was saying how he died had me fearing the worst. The cause and affect of what happened are basically incomprehensible.
I didn't know Terry beyond the community on this board and chatting a little with him at Miguel's and the crags. But the amount of good that he did for the Red is huge. Simply as someone who loves climbing at the Red, I have a huge debt of gratitude to Terry.
To Terry's friends - I know it's impossible, but don't beat yourselves up. What ever it was, it was all in Terry's own head.
I just deleted a whole bunch of ranting - I'll try to say this simply. Someone reading this thread about Terry's death may be thinking about commiting suicide. Certainly, someone reading this will think about it in the future. Depression, by it's nature, clouds your judgement. Suicide seems like the rational, right thing to do. For all your problems - all the things you've done wrong - commiting suicide would be the only real mistake you could make. I can tell you, and lots of other people can tell you, that you can recover. The emptiness can go away, you can deal with your problems, you can feel again.
Some people deal with depression off and on throughout their lives, and they know how to ride it out. For other people it hits them out of the blue. It's something totally different than being 'sad' or 'down' for a while. After months or even years of being empty, disconnected or just not feeling anything - it can seem like it will never end. The hardest thing can be telling someone about it or asking for help. You operate with what seems like a cold, comforting rationality - that you are seeing things 'the way they really are.'
In that little corner of your mind that is still thinking clearly, you need to remember that you will get better. Even if you can't ask for help, even if you resist help, you need to stick it out.
I didn't know Terry beyond the community on this board and chatting a little with him at Miguel's and the crags. But the amount of good that he did for the Red is huge. Simply as someone who loves climbing at the Red, I have a huge debt of gratitude to Terry.
To Terry's friends - I know it's impossible, but don't beat yourselves up. What ever it was, it was all in Terry's own head.
I just deleted a whole bunch of ranting - I'll try to say this simply. Someone reading this thread about Terry's death may be thinking about commiting suicide. Certainly, someone reading this will think about it in the future. Depression, by it's nature, clouds your judgement. Suicide seems like the rational, right thing to do. For all your problems - all the things you've done wrong - commiting suicide would be the only real mistake you could make. I can tell you, and lots of other people can tell you, that you can recover. The emptiness can go away, you can deal with your problems, you can feel again.
Some people deal with depression off and on throughout their lives, and they know how to ride it out. For other people it hits them out of the blue. It's something totally different than being 'sad' or 'down' for a while. After months or even years of being empty, disconnected or just not feeling anything - it can seem like it will never end. The hardest thing can be telling someone about it or asking for help. You operate with what seems like a cold, comforting rationality - that you are seeing things 'the way they really are.'
In that little corner of your mind that is still thinking clearly, you need to remember that you will get better. Even if you can't ask for help, even if you resist help, you need to stick it out.
Bacon is meat candy.
-
the lurkist
- Posts: 2240
- Joined: Wed Nov 13, 2002 2:07 pm
I have a Terry story.
I wish I had said this yesterday at the funeral... I knew I would regret not stepping up...
here is one.
I was at a four year old birthday party recently at an indoor gymnastics place and my cell phone rings and it is Terry. He is standing at the base of Military underneath Danita Dolores and he wants to re equip it. So he asked my permission (which I was humbled by) and then we commence to discuss each bolt placement in detail for the next several minutes. The fact that he would, one, put so much energy and thought into this task on a route that is just okay, and then solicit my input... I was humbled. This coming from a guy who considered EVERY permutation of cause and effect regarding bolti placement, clipping, the in the moment in real time marriage of the movement over the rock by the climber to the inert unchanging sentinal of the rock... etc... Terry totally got it. He understood the sublime of our sport and the creation of the canvas, the medium that our sport takes place upon.
He was going for the total experience, and he held that up in route developement above all things. As Chris Martin would say, Terry held his craft to a very high standard. He had contempt for those who did not.
I guess I am an old schooler. I was climbing before Terry. I was always humbled and flattered that he would consider my opinion regarding anchors, the mechanics of boltiing, the creation of the canvas for the expression of our performance art.
The other experience that I got choked up about was how much my daughter liked Terry. As many of you know, my wife and I have taken free license to raise our daughter in your midst, at the cliff, sometimes underfoot, a little girl who while probably cute and endearing, is at best a distraction from the serious business of sending and cranking. Terry loved to sit with her and play. Hell, I think small children were a Kindred spirit. One day, when I was unable to climb, Di took Amelia and went climbing and hooked up with Terry. That night I was regaled with stories of Terry. Amelia would tell me over and over how Terry taught her how to be invisible. He showed her a trick, where you take your thumb and put it on you forehead and hold out you fingers splayed apart, and see? You are invisible. She bought it lock stock and barrel. Goofy as hell, as TK would say.
We waited to tell Amelia until last night that Daddy had to say goodbye to Terry yesterday and that he was dead. That is a hard thing to do.
Poor fellow....
I am so sorry.
I wish I had said this yesterday at the funeral... I knew I would regret not stepping up...
here is one.
I was at a four year old birthday party recently at an indoor gymnastics place and my cell phone rings and it is Terry. He is standing at the base of Military underneath Danita Dolores and he wants to re equip it. So he asked my permission (which I was humbled by) and then we commence to discuss each bolt placement in detail for the next several minutes. The fact that he would, one, put so much energy and thought into this task on a route that is just okay, and then solicit my input... I was humbled. This coming from a guy who considered EVERY permutation of cause and effect regarding bolti placement, clipping, the in the moment in real time marriage of the movement over the rock by the climber to the inert unchanging sentinal of the rock... etc... Terry totally got it. He understood the sublime of our sport and the creation of the canvas, the medium that our sport takes place upon.
He was going for the total experience, and he held that up in route developement above all things. As Chris Martin would say, Terry held his craft to a very high standard. He had contempt for those who did not.
I guess I am an old schooler. I was climbing before Terry. I was always humbled and flattered that he would consider my opinion regarding anchors, the mechanics of boltiing, the creation of the canvas for the expression of our performance art.
The other experience that I got choked up about was how much my daughter liked Terry. As many of you know, my wife and I have taken free license to raise our daughter in your midst, at the cliff, sometimes underfoot, a little girl who while probably cute and endearing, is at best a distraction from the serious business of sending and cranking. Terry loved to sit with her and play. Hell, I think small children were a Kindred spirit. One day, when I was unable to climb, Di took Amelia and went climbing and hooked up with Terry. That night I was regaled with stories of Terry. Amelia would tell me over and over how Terry taught her how to be invisible. He showed her a trick, where you take your thumb and put it on you forehead and hold out you fingers splayed apart, and see? You are invisible. She bought it lock stock and barrel. Goofy as hell, as TK would say.
We waited to tell Amelia until last night that Daddy had to say goodbye to Terry yesterday and that he was dead. That is a hard thing to do.
Poor fellow....
I am so sorry.
"It really is all good ! My thinking only occasionally calls it differently..."
Normie
Normie