Kittens

Innocent subjects that took a turn for the worst.
Meadows
Posts: 5395
Joined: Mon Jul 07, 2003 4:03 pm

Post by Meadows »

Guys: Forget a bottle of wine or 1/5 of Jose and X on your next date. Felines are the gifts that keep on giving because according to the following research, cats could make their owners a little more promiscuous:

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,102093,00.html

http://www.futurepundit.com/archives/001675.html
marathonmedic
Posts: 1557
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2004 3:01 am

Post by marathonmedic »

Canuck wrote:so here's a question, for all you folks who have cats and go away a lot on weekends (and all those who don't have cats because of similar concerns)(and ... anyone else who has an opinion): have you ever had problems like this? do you feel guilty about leaving them home alone a lot? and how much time away from home and cat is too much?
I've never had a problem with leaving my furrballs at home. They're always really happy to see me when I come home from a 24-hour shift, but the only time I ever got a "surprise" was the first night after I moved and I sort of expected that one. It was just someone's way of expressing themselves and that was the end of it. When I go away for a weekend or so I usually just put out lots of extra food so they can do the all-you-can-eat bit until I get back or con someone into feeding them for me.
KD
Posts: 3155
Joined: Mon Dec 15, 2003 1:21 am

Post by KD »

so here's a question, for all you folks who have cats and go away a lot on weekends (and all those who don't have cats because of similar concerns)(and ... anyone else who has an opinion): have you ever had problems like this? do you feel guilty about leaving them home alone a lot? and how much time away from home and cat is too much?
We've got six at home. When we travel we have friends that stop in and feed, water, and scoop them. We returm the favor when they travel, so it works out pretty well. A cat (singular) needs a good bit of attention/affection, but multiple cats keep each other company pretty well. If you have many misgivings about adopting one, I'd recommend that you follow your conscience for now and remain catless. Nothing is sadder than an adopted cat being returned because it didn't work out. I help an agency here sometimes and remember a lady who adopted a nice cat only to return it three months later because she redecorated and the cat no longer matched the furniture. geez!

Adopting one is a great thing to do to help a needy cat - but the real answer is more spaying and neutering - this ends unwanted cats from being dumped in the country and having more litters.
marathonmedic
Posts: 1557
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2004 3:01 am

Post by marathonmedic »

*in Cartman voice* DUDE, SICK!
Ticking is gym climbing outdoors.
spuzo
Posts: 1163
Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2003 11:03 pm

Post by spuzo »

yeah - we assume that the momma cat, who was little more than a kitten herself, got knocked up and the owner didnt want to deal with it, so they dumped her in the woods. I hate that, makes me sick. BUT they wondered on to our place and once she realized we would feed her, she brought her five little guys to us. They are great therapy though, box full of kittens, cures what ales ya.

Cutest thing I've seen in a long time - kitten in a bucket, chasing its tail.

anyway - they stayed all last week at our cabin with no one there, we left them a bucket of food, bucket of water and left the door cracked open for them...they slept inside and then went out to play all day...back in at night. I think right now, if they were adopted, they would make good indoor/outdoor cats...or just indoor. They were born in the jungle of the Red..so they like it outside....oh and one of them has displayed some awesome natural bouldering abilities. CRAG KITTIES!!!!
"I enjoyed a Guinness after I got back home from Palm Sunday Mass." - Captain Static


"Listen, you heard what I said. Do you want me to donate or not charlie. Suck it up and procreate." - Andrew
marathonmedic
Posts: 1557
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2004 3:01 am

Post by marathonmedic »

spuzo wrote:oh and one of them has displayed some awesome natural bouldering abilities. CRAG KITTIES!!!!
Just what I need, something else showing me up at the crag.
dipsi
Posts: 4217
Joined: Thu Sep 26, 2002 9:54 pm

Post by dipsi »

I feel your pain! :cry:
Horatio Felacio
Posts: 3338
Joined: Tue Sep 24, 2002 7:26 pm

Post by Horatio Felacio »

Yasmeen the Terrible wrote:
i had a kitten once as a small child. his name was sugarfoot due to his one front paw that was pure white. we would play together. i would dress him up in cheerleader outfits, pretend to date him, marry him, and late have kids with him. my friends at school thought this was funny and soon they turned in to my enemies always making fun of poor horatio who played house with his cat sugarfoot. i didn't care. i was in love. we would talk, i'd let him know how my day went, and how i got made fun of. he would purr and wrap around my legs letting me know that he still loved me. when he saw that i was sad he would catch mice and lay them in front of my bed as a good toast to my health and happiness, when he was hungry he would "ask"me for dinner. "of course sugarfoot. you may have some chicken surprise casserole with a side of eggrolls", all of which was in the disguise of kibbles and bits. shhhhh! when he was sleepy he would curl up in my lap and i would sit there stroking his gray and black stripes all day long if he had wanted. as i grew older things started to change. as sugarfoot took more and more naps in my lap i became an age where the warmth and softness would make me hard. at first i thought it was funny, but then i realized it felt so good. i began taking my pants off and letting him sleep. when i became aroused i would rock back and forth trying not to wake little ol' sugarfoot, but at the same time vigorously trying to produce that sticky liquid that would come out when i felt my best. i became addicted to playing with sugarfoot naked. i began to just catch him and hold him and stroke my hard penis against his warm, furry body, and ejaculate on his back. he would have hard, crust all over hime after a few days and i would have to bathe sugarfoot regularly. sugarfoot began to hate our play time. he would his and pretend to scratch, but that feeling felt so good i forgot that i really cared about sugarfoot. i became an animal too. madly flailing against that cat fur with all the speed i could muster! i would come to orgasm and then start all over again and again and again. sugarfoot would start to become angry and really scratch me and bite me and draw blood. this angered me! i became so used to this behavior, when sugarfoot began hurting me, that i had to keep him from doing that. i was in a rage, marched downstairs naked, to the kitchen where my mom was cooking potroast. and there i was naked, grabbing a butter knife and masking tape. i ran back up stairs threw sugarfoot against the wall as hard as i could. this temporarily knocked him out so i taped his paws together and his mouth shut. i then pierced sugarfoots neck with the butterknife and saw the life come out of him and i was happy. i used the corpse for several days as my masturbating device before he started to decompose and all the hair began falling out. i then realized at what i had become. an addict to cats. so please, please yasmeen, give me a cat!
Yo HO!! Just got me a code red and some funyons big dawg!!! SHIT YEAH! - Ray, excited about his breakfast
rhunt
Posts: 3202
Joined: Thu May 29, 2003 12:02 pm

Post by rhunt »

Yasmeen, please give Horatio a cat. After that touching heart-felt story, how can you not....excuse me I need a tissue :cry:
"Climbing is the spice, not the meal." ~ Lurkist
Yasmeen
Posts: 4663
Joined: Tue Oct 08, 2002 10:42 am

Post by Yasmeen »

Listen, you guys. This is serious fucking business. I already told Matt why we couldn't give him one of the kittens, but since he refuses to handle things in a mature fashion, I'll post it again here, publicly:
I, in a PM to Horatio, wrote:Matt,

Had you but said this earlier I would have saved one of the kittens for you. See, this is why I don't believe in spaying and neutering the stray animals of the world. Because no matter how many stray animals there are wandering the streets, there will always be more sick fuckers like you who want to have their way with them. So, I regret to inform you that we've actually signed the kittens (and all of their offspring, as we refuse to get them spayed or neutered) off to the "Kitties For Inmates" program that is just taking off. Its aim is to lower the rate of inmate rape in prisons by giving each prisoner his own, live, personal sex toy. Perhaps you could go turn yourself in and become an inmate yourself, and receive one of our pussies that way!

Sincerely,
Yasmeen
Co-Founder, Kitties For Inmates, Inc.
"I snatched defeat from the jaws of victory." --Paul
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(Emails > PMs)
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