You know you're a trad climber when...

[John E]

All your draws are 12" long * you've worn out a set of cams * there
is scar tissue on the back of your hands * you shave the back of your
hands * you have six partially used rolls of tape in your pack * you
quit sport climbing because you can't do any of the routes * you see
lots of sunrises on your climbing trips * you say, "what?" when your
leader says, "take!" * your ledge is set up in your room to hold all
your climbing gear * you have climbing shoes you can wear all day *
you don't care when your gym membership expires * you enjoy
guilt-free eating * you don't know what your body-fat % is * you ask
your partner how much water to bring along * you do a first ascent
and report the names of both members in your party * you drop your
belay device and you still know how to belay * you read back-issues
of mountain gazette * you know how to turn a crack 'n up into a beak
* you know what a beak is * you wake up at 2:00am to go climbing *
your drill uses a hammer * you take a nap in the middle of a climb *
you spend three hours removing a fixed cam * you don't want beta *
you think a bong is a type of piton * you remember when climbing gear
didn't have springs * you take a forty footer * you summit a desert
tower * you know what an abalakov hook is * you still use a gear
sling * there is a holster on your harness * you rappel six pitches
in the dark * you rappel six pitches in the snow * you drill from a
stance * you're looking down at the birds * you own a hammer and a
haul bag * you have sex on a belay ledge * you're on day 2 of a sport
climbing trip and you can't remember what you did on day 1 * you drop
your water bottle and it takes five seconds to hit * your rack is
worth more than your car * your best memories are from the epics
you've had * you have a great day of climbing then find out you
didn't do the route you thought you did * you spend a night hanging
in slings * you miss work on monday because you epic'd on sunday * a
whole block of chalk fits in your chalk bag * you dump your S.O.
because he just doesn't get it * you wear out a set of jugs * you
drive all night so you can climb all day * you drive all night
because you climbed all day * you're up so high the trees look like
broccoli * your rack of pins is heavier than your rack of draws *
your slings have knots in them * you know who larry penberthy is *
you know the difference between a copperhead and a circlehead * you
think "beta" is a video tape format * you can shit and and belay at
the same time * you wear socks in your climbing shoes * a long
approach doesn't deter you from a good climb * a good job doesn't
deter you from a good climb * Hendrix runs through your head while
you're climbing * you coil your rope * you've set up a belay with the
only piece of gear left on your rack * your climbing pants don't
stretch *

[Stewy911]

So true!

[diggum]

Man, did you actually read all of those?

I didn't make it.

[kato]

I think I met all the qualifications but one.

[skychick]

I think I met all the qualifications but one.

(Remembering a music discussion at CT) Is this the one that you don't meet?
* Hendrix runs through your head while you're climbing

[captain static]

I don't think he's dumped his SO cause she does get it

[chester]

cute....real cute...

[ynot]

I can relate to 80% of those.

[haas]

my favorite is sex in a belay ledge.

I set up my ledge when I first got it with the fly and hung it from one of the hooks in the ceiling for a hanging plant so that way my fiancee would say "Cool!" Instead of "How much was that?" It's treated us well

[rockclimbingdude]

I think my best sex was the same.