SCIN - RRG good guy or raging ass nugget?
Okay, to hell with this. I must tell.
Tonight I went to Horatio's house. He and his roommate asked me over for "tea" (that's what they called it). I kindly obliged.
I drove my Mercedes down to the get-O and dodged the bullets to their residence. I rang the "Adams Family like" doorbell and waited for a response.
Twenty rings and three minutes later Horatio answered the door.
The man was wearing a gas mask and sitting in a wheelchair. Strapped to his wrist was a long tube. The tube went straight to another wheelchair behind him in which sat his roommate George. The tube was attached to George's penis. I asked a simple question "Horatio, what is the tube all about?" Horatio replied "The tube is about my life". I asked no more.
Horatio maneuvered his wheelchair around, pulling and stretching George's penis in the process. George giggled like a little girl and pointed at his penis as it was stretching. "Stretchy! Stretchy!" he yelled. Slobber ran down his lip as his one eye fluttered. I smiled at the site of such happiness. I remember a time when my life was so simple. I remember playing with my chemistry set. I remember creating monsters. I remember the fishing line. I remember the toilet paper roll which we adhered the artificial hair from a fake Santa Claus doll to and attached to a coat hanger. We called him "The Manhattan Project". I laid on the floor while my friend "plunged" the toy on my penis. It was okay though because we weren't *really* touching one another.
I smiled at the site of George having his penis pulled by the tube attached to Horatio's wrist. The tube appeared clear. Horatio asked me to follow him into the kitchen to have a look at the new magnet he and his roommate received in the mail. As I glanced at the fridge, I tried hard to appear to be taking an interest in the shiny new "Budweiser bikini girl" magnet. "My sister is in the hospital" I said. Horatio's eyes lit up. Drool ran down the side of his mouth. "Why?" he asked. "Someone tried to create a magnet out of her. They tied her up and scraped her head into the ground. As they did so, they kicked their leg up and down like a dog with fleas and each time. The kicking created a rhythmic sound that upset the waves in her brain and created a chemical imbalance. She has been sentenced to a life of confusion and torment....roaming the streets of here and there. Where? Anywhere. She searches for men on the run and creates a life of chasing them. She attaches her mind to them and stirs emotions. The emotions eventually manifest themselves into pills then she gets addicted to them. Therefore she has a clan of mental patients following her around. They can't live without her and she can't live without them."
"So, do you like the magnet?" he asked. "Yes. Yes. I do Horatio. I love the magnet". I took advantage of the opportunity and detached the tube from Horatio's wrist. Just as I suspected it was a fake arm. The tube actually ran through the fake arm, into his shorts and into the tip of his penis. All this time Horatio and his roommate were communicating through their penises. George would flex his poop-cutter-offer muscle and Horatio would flex his pee-really-hard muscle.
I decided that these were not people I wished to be around. I abruptly left the house, got into my car and drove away. My Mercedes had a bit of a smell but I realized it was okay. "Things smell sometimes Ray" I said out loud. "Things smell and it's okay that they smell. Just settle down and create a home with the wax you obtain from the fake bodies you will kill tonight."
Tonight I went to Horatio's house. He and his roommate asked me over for "tea" (that's what they called it). I kindly obliged.
I drove my Mercedes down to the get-O and dodged the bullets to their residence. I rang the "Adams Family like" doorbell and waited for a response.
Twenty rings and three minutes later Horatio answered the door.
The man was wearing a gas mask and sitting in a wheelchair. Strapped to his wrist was a long tube. The tube went straight to another wheelchair behind him in which sat his roommate George. The tube was attached to George's penis. I asked a simple question "Horatio, what is the tube all about?" Horatio replied "The tube is about my life". I asked no more.
Horatio maneuvered his wheelchair around, pulling and stretching George's penis in the process. George giggled like a little girl and pointed at his penis as it was stretching. "Stretchy! Stretchy!" he yelled. Slobber ran down his lip as his one eye fluttered. I smiled at the site of such happiness. I remember a time when my life was so simple. I remember playing with my chemistry set. I remember creating monsters. I remember the fishing line. I remember the toilet paper roll which we adhered the artificial hair from a fake Santa Claus doll to and attached to a coat hanger. We called him "The Manhattan Project". I laid on the floor while my friend "plunged" the toy on my penis. It was okay though because we weren't *really* touching one another.
I smiled at the site of George having his penis pulled by the tube attached to Horatio's wrist. The tube appeared clear. Horatio asked me to follow him into the kitchen to have a look at the new magnet he and his roommate received in the mail. As I glanced at the fridge, I tried hard to appear to be taking an interest in the shiny new "Budweiser bikini girl" magnet. "My sister is in the hospital" I said. Horatio's eyes lit up. Drool ran down the side of his mouth. "Why?" he asked. "Someone tried to create a magnet out of her. They tied her up and scraped her head into the ground. As they did so, they kicked their leg up and down like a dog with fleas and each time. The kicking created a rhythmic sound that upset the waves in her brain and created a chemical imbalance. She has been sentenced to a life of confusion and torment....roaming the streets of here and there. Where? Anywhere. She searches for men on the run and creates a life of chasing them. She attaches her mind to them and stirs emotions. The emotions eventually manifest themselves into pills then she gets addicted to them. Therefore she has a clan of mental patients following her around. They can't live without her and she can't live without them."
"So, do you like the magnet?" he asked. "Yes. Yes. I do Horatio. I love the magnet". I took advantage of the opportunity and detached the tube from Horatio's wrist. Just as I suspected it was a fake arm. The tube actually ran through the fake arm, into his shorts and into the tip of his penis. All this time Horatio and his roommate were communicating through their penises. George would flex his poop-cutter-offer muscle and Horatio would flex his pee-really-hard muscle.
I decided that these were not people I wished to be around. I abruptly left the house, got into my car and drove away. My Mercedes had a bit of a smell but I realized it was okay. "Things smell sometimes Ray" I said out loud. "Things smell and it's okay that they smell. Just settle down and create a home with the wax you obtain from the fake bodies you will kill tonight."
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Horatio Felacio
- Posts: 3338
- Joined: Tue Sep 24, 2002 7:26 pm
fuck. yeah, it's true ladies and gentlemen. george and i do communicate with our peni. that is why we cannot talk over the phone and that is why i cut my dick off with a spoon. your penis will not save you. it will not love you. it will not help you. it will not talk to you on wednesday night. i know what you're thinking. i've gone mad. Horatio's insane. the kid went nuts. well, what if i told you insane was sitting in front of a computer all day, typing questions like "what crags stay sunny?", "what are the hardest routes in the world?", "when are we going to get to beat off to SCIN doing a 5.6 trad route?". what if i told you "gone nuts" really means you've taken a liking to your pet elmo doll, named him reynold, and comb his hair with a fork like an overcaring mother clinging to her dead child she just suffocated because of the 24-7 crying. how many of you would be "normal" then? how many of you would claim your life as a mistake only to reach to the bottle of percasets and fifth of makers to end your miserable existence and enter a world of the unknown? how many? 0? 1? i think not. i think you're all in deep shit and the faster you acknowledge the manifestation of your sickness into the perceived normality of life, the faster you will see what life truly is. don't blame me for bringing this truth to light, but blame yourself for "carrying out" evolution of the human race. get off the internet and go outside.
Yo HO!! Just got me a code red and some funyons big dawg!!! SHIT YEAH! - Ray, excited about his breakfast
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Poster known as Wallnut
- Posts: 88
- Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 4:53 pm
Re: SCIN - RRG good guy or raging ass nugget?
This place just isn't the same anymore.
The theory of evolution is just as stupid as the theories of gravity and electromagnetism.
Re: SCIN - RRG good guy or raging ass nugget?
Yep - miss the old times.
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milspecmark
- Posts: 418
- Joined: Mon Aug 31, 2009 5:46 pm
Re: SCIN - RRG good guy or raging ass nugget?
"His poop cutter off muscle and his pee really hard muscle" Hillarious