Rich people
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Re: Rich people
dude, you already did this! check the back cover of your 1st edition climbing guidebook/christmas card. i haven't received your 2nd edition christmas card yet.SCIN wrote:So how much money do I have to make to reach the point where I feel I need to send people I barely know holiday greeting cards with Olan Mills type photos of Michelle and myself wearing sweaters and smiling with the words "Happy Holidays from the Ellingtons" at the bottom?
Yo HO!! Just got me a code red and some funyons big dawg!!! SHIT YEAH! - Ray, excited about his breakfast
SCIN,
I have calculated your tax base and AGI, and found that you are eligible to mail out cards with cardigans. An Excel file is attached to verify your lameness in all things rich people love. I took the median salary for network admins, divided by your age to come up with a nerd/gay co-efficient.
You earned two personal exemptions by having a hot wife and one killer tattoo.
I added a $300 interest/penalty surcharge for not driving an SUV or Subaru.
Since your trad rack now collects dust under your "personal home gym" mats, you are VERY close to being a colored tape whore. This is one step closer to being a citified indoor gym rat. I was able to take a tax credit for the 50 Cent cassette tapes you play in house, but the signed posters of Chris Linder when he was 4 could pose a legal issue with the IRS and NAMBLA.
Since the average income of a REAL rock climber is below the poverty line, merely by living in a two wage earner household the IRS dictates you must send holiday cards with your dogs in cardigans. This allows you to show that a person can crank hard without sacrificing creature comforts. All the rastas on here should be included on your card list..please send their cards c/o Powell County Detention Center.
BTW- thanks for the plaid scarf you knitted for me.
I have calculated your tax base and AGI, and found that you are eligible to mail out cards with cardigans. An Excel file is attached to verify your lameness in all things rich people love. I took the median salary for network admins, divided by your age to come up with a nerd/gay co-efficient.
You earned two personal exemptions by having a hot wife and one killer tattoo.
I added a $300 interest/penalty surcharge for not driving an SUV or Subaru.
Since your trad rack now collects dust under your "personal home gym" mats, you are VERY close to being a colored tape whore. This is one step closer to being a citified indoor gym rat. I was able to take a tax credit for the 50 Cent cassette tapes you play in house, but the signed posters of Chris Linder when he was 4 could pose a legal issue with the IRS and NAMBLA.
Since the average income of a REAL rock climber is below the poverty line, merely by living in a two wage earner household the IRS dictates you must send holiday cards with your dogs in cardigans. This allows you to show that a person can crank hard without sacrificing creature comforts. All the rastas on here should be included on your card list..please send their cards c/o Powell County Detention Center.
BTW- thanks for the plaid scarf you knitted for me.
Positive vibes brah...positive vibes.
Piggy,
I've arranged a sitting at the Olan Mills studio in Chevy Chase for you, Karen, River, Michelle and I. We're all wearing red so you guys wear green. The backdrop will be a snowy evening in Central Park.
Horatio,
Shell out the money and support a friend. I need that extra $5.00 for the holidays.
I've arranged a sitting at the Olan Mills studio in Chevy Chase for you, Karen, River, Michelle and I. We're all wearing red so you guys wear green. The backdrop will be a snowy evening in Central Park.
Horatio,
Shell out the money and support a friend. I need that extra $5.00 for the holidays.
Yo Ray jack dynomite! Listen to my beat box! Bew ch ch pff BEW ch ch pfff! Sweet!
-Horatio
-Horatio
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thanks doll.
this is our family.
this is our family.
Last edited by anticlmber on Mon Dec 03, 2007 1:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Like me on facebook but hate me in real life
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- Joined: Tue Sep 24, 2002 7:26 pm
Ray, you've totally forgotten about the "Christmas Letter" - minimum 5 pages, single spaced, but with a little room for the shittiest Christmas clip art you can scrounge out of a standard MS Office installation. Your dogs are 'gifted' and, damn it, we want to know in excruciating detail what sort of gifted shit they've done all year!
Bacon is meat candy.